resources + inspiration

    • The New Rules of Marriage by Terrence Real

    • How to be an Adult in Relationships by David Richo

    • We Do by Stan Tatkin

    • In Each Other’s Care: A Guide to the Most Common Relationship Conflicts and How to Work Through Them by Stan Tatkin

    • Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship by Stan Tatkin

    • Fierce Intimacy by Terrence Real (Audible only)

    • Making Love Real: The Intelligent Couple’s Guide to Lasting Intimacy + Passion by Celeste Hirschman and Danielle Harel

    • The Course of Love by Alain de Botton

    • Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson

    • Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix and Helen Hunt

    • Podcasts: Relationship Alive!; The Relationship School Podcast

    • Alain de Botton, philosopher, teacher and author, speaking about Romantic love. This video offers teaching and inspiration on how to have grown-up, long term intimate partnerships with real, imperfect humans. I highly recommend it.

    • After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful by Janis Abrahms Spring

    • Intimacy After Infidelity: How to Rebuild + Affair-Proof Your Marriage by Steven Solomon + Lorie Teagno

    • The New Monogamy by Tammy Nelson

    • When You’re the One Who Cheats by Tammy Nelson

    • State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity by Esther Perel

    • "This is how to stop your partner from cheating" video with Esther Perel

    • The Divorce Remedy by Michelle Weiner Davis

    • Polysecure by Jessica Fern

    • Open Deeply by Kate Loree

    • Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists and their Clients by Martha Kauppi

    • The Jealousy Workbook by Kathy Labriola

    • Building Open Relationships by Dr. Liz Powell

    • More than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory by Eve Rickert and Franklin Veaux

    • Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino

    • A Happy Life in an Open Relationship by Susan Wenzel

    • Rewriting the Rules: An Anti Self-Help Guide to Sex, Love and Relationships by Meg-John Barker

    • The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy

    • Podcast: Multiamory

    • Baby Bomb: A Relationship Survival Guide for New Parents by Kara Hoppe and Stan Tatkin

    • Parenting from the Inside Out: How a Deeper Self-understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive by Daniel Siegel

    • Transforming the Difficult Child by Howard Glasser

    • Difficultchild.com

    • Raising Kids Ok by Dorothy Ellen Babcock

  • BOOKS

    • Coming Together by Celeste Hirschman and Danielle Harel

    • Making Love Real by Celeste Hirschman and Danielle Harel

    • Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex by Ian Kerner

    • Intimacy Educator: Teaching Through Touch by Caffyn Jesse

    • Getting the Sex You Want by Tammy Nelson

    • Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch

    • Good Sex: Getting Off without Checking Out by Jessica Graham

    • Sex Without Stress by Jessa Zimmerman

    • The Erotic Mind by Jack Morin

    • Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel

    • The Heart of Desire by Stella Resnick

    • Sexual Healing: The Complete Guide to Overcoming Common Sexual Problems

    • Anal Pleasure and Health by Jack Morin

    PODCASTS

    • Podcast about creating hot foreplay

    • Organic Sexuality with Rahi Chun (somatic sex educator)

    • The Trouble with Sex with Tammy Nelson (AASECT certified sex therapist)

    • Better Sex with Jessa Zimmerman (AASECT certified sex therapist)

    • Shameless Sex (sex educator and coach)

    • Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

    ETHICAL PORN:

    • erikalust.com

    VIDEO LESSONS ON EROTIC TOUCH:

    • Women Who Run with the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes

    • Girl Sex 101 by Allison Moon

    • The Whole Lesbian Sex Book by Felice Newman

    • Tantric Sex for Women: A Guide for Lesbian, Bi, Hetero, and Solo Lovers by Christina Schulte

    • The Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein and Felice Picano

    • wpath

    • Queer Sex: A Trans and Non-binary Guide to Intimacy, Pleasure + Relationships by Juno Roche

    • Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women’s Love and Desire by Lisa M. Diamond

    • ACE by Angela Chen

    • The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge by Tristan Taormino

    • The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy

    • The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy

    • Tantric Orgasm for Women by Diana Richardson

    • Urban Tantra by Barbara Carellas

    • Tantric Sex for Women: A Guide to Lesbian, Bi, Hetero and Solo Lovers

    • Healing Sex by Staci Haines

    • The Sexual Healing Journey by Wendy Maltz 

    • Life, Reinvented: A Guide to Healing from Sexual Trauma for Survivors and Loved Ones by Erin Carpenter

    • Sex, God, and the Conservative Church by Tina Sellers

    • Conscious Uncoupling by Katherine Woodward Thomas

  • “So even if the hot loneliness is there, and for 1.6 seconds we sit with that restlessness when yesterday we couldn't sit for even one, that's the journey of the warrior." -Pema Chodron

  • “We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don't really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It's just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy." -Pema Chodron

    "Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves, and so I chose to tell myself a different story."- Cheryl Strayed

    • The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

    • A New Earth: Awakening to your Life's Purpose by Eckhart Tolle

    • The End of Your World by Adyashanti